Typical Day With My Three Crazy Aunts

          Today not a single insightful thought entered my mind; mainly because I have much schoolwork to do. This morning I decided to complete my Spanish project presentation last minute by bringing random magazine photos to identify as family members and then wing the content. Talking about family members extemporaneously was “easy peasy lemon squeezy” because back in 10^th grade I used to enter competitions that included talking for five minutes about a random subject given. Anyway, I volunteered to go and my teacher praised my pronunciation, giving me 100%.

          I then left with photos in hand waiting for my three crazy aunts to pick me up at the corner of the street because I know they hate it when I stand in that location, especially whilst wearing short-shorts and knee-high socks. Of course when they were about to pull over I began to frantically wave the photos as a means to embarrass them to which I succeeded. (I tend to use embarrassment to exact revenge on my aunts because I generally do not care what people think about me, especially random people I will never meet again.) As I entered the car their very random taunts ensued. Since I have been hearing these sorts of comments since I was about 13, I kept to myself and tried not to get involved. I guess it's just a weird form of them teasing me, but sometimes I'm not sure...

          “Oh my God, Brianna! Do you think you're ten or something?” (I had my hair in two braids.) “You look like such a ho bag, why don't you put some pants on?” “If we were trapped on a boat, we'd only keep you to use your arms to row us and eat the good muscle meat from your strong legs.” “I can imagine you wearing a milk maid costume to school with your hair like that. Suddenly, the car stopped for a guy to walk by at a crosswalk. “Did you see that guy? He was cute.” To which I instinctively replied “Ew.” More teasing came from that one worded statement. “What? He dressed nicely too!” “And he was very fit, a manly man.” “You have a weird taste for guys, Brianna.” “Yeah, she likes those metro-sexual guys who look effeminate.” “Nhi, it's because you look and act like a man.” “Your face looks just like a man's. All you need to do is cut your hair.” “She likes rednecks too. I don't know why she loves boots and a southern accent.” “And those indie chain smoking guys with skinny jeans. Gross. Do you smoke, Nhi?” “And Rastafarian guys with dreads! Ew.” “And guys with pocket protectors!” which led me to me say “Pocket protectors are so useful! A pen exploded on me once a-” “Nhi, you're such a nerd.” So I gave them the -_-;; face and there was silence for the rest of the car ride until we reached our destination.

          We were going to lunch at Friendly Confines instead of a Korean or Japanese restaurant as intended because none of my aunts had make-up on. When we entered, the room full of men turned toward us to look for a second and then resumed their conversations. As we were walking towards the table, my aunts were saying “Brianna, they're looking at you. You shouldn't have worn those short-shorts. Stop being such a hoochie.” “Every time I look at you I think of a Japanese anime character because of your hair.” “And when you do the peace sign I think of Chung Li from Street Fighter.” “You know your short-shorts show off the poop stain on your legs.” This last comment had me making a -_-;; face again because they were being so immature for being adults. The “poop stain” is actually just a tan birthmark on the back of my top-left thigh, which I happen to like. (It's funny because I never noticed that birthmark until high school when I looked at myself in a mirror.) Anyway, when we left my aunts threw more comments about me and how I let lecherous men leer at me so easily by dressing like a tramp. So a typical day with my three crazy aunts include them constantly making remarks about me being and dressing like a whore, the types of guys I like and anything else they can think of to make fun of me. I still love them though. >_<

**This was written in place of the "logical battle" mentioned in my first blog entry... ha.
***Also, they're only like this to me. They're actually super nice and friendly to everyone! : ) If you don't know, I'm the family rebel, outcast and scapegoat (which I am totally fine with that because I can handle it and I'd rather it be me than anyone else in the family).