Have you ever walked down a treacherously long pier during a dark, windy day? You just keep walking, and walking, and walking out farther into the ocean until you've reached the point where you know things will not end well if you fall... right... now. Looking down at the crashing waves you decide to sit on the edge, knowing from experience that your balance can be trusted. However, once you sit doubt emerges because of the playful winds laughing in your ears (at you) and trying to push you in. Join them, it'll be fun. The spray from the waves splashing against the pier are getting your jeans wet, it's starting to feel uncomfortable all this salty water and wind messing up your hair. This frigid experience is not as romantic or mysterious as you had imagined earlier. You remain seated anyway, you turn back and everything is just so far. So alone... After deciding to lie down on the damp, rotting boards you tell yourself that after being this cold, wet and isolated, nothing in life will ever be so bad. That was the point of this, right? But, you are so alone.


Where did you find this pier anyway? No one else has ever seen such gray skies. How is there not a single other person on this beach or pier? What kind of thoughts should be going through your brain at this place and moment?


And then I picked myself up, crossed my arms to clutch onto my jacket, and began to walk quickly to my car. This is all going to be some distant memory I can think back to and re-experience. Good memories, that's all I need to survive. Now how the hell am I supposed to pay for the gas to drive back home?