I put on lipstick just for you
To look good for an hour, maybe two
I wiped off enough, just to kiss
What a waste

"He's being completely selfish" Aaron urged. "Think about it. What did he say to keep you? That he loves you? That he doesn't want to lose you? That he'll change for you?"

"...... yeah."

Aaron's frustration grew and he typed on his phone thinking of ways to emotionally and logically make Lisa realize what she has to do. She was so close to making the right decision, he couldn't let her slip away.

"But I'm more happy than unhappy with him."

What is she saying? Does she not realize that those two feelings do not balance each other out? She should not be unhappy at all, no matter how happy she is when she's with George. Defeated, Aaron decided to let her be. Maybe one day her unhappiness will outweigh her happiness.

"You're an idiot" Aaron muttered at his monitor while stalking George's Facebook profile. George was certainly better looking than Aaron, and Aaron knew that. Aaron could also see that George wasn't exactly the most handsome guy, average at best. He scrolled down and stared at George's relationship status: In a relationship with Lisa Thompson.

Oh, Lisa. Lovely, lovely Lisa. He clicked onto his inbox and asked her how she was doing. He decided he was tired now and went to lie down in bed with his ferret, Lee. The best part of his life was how much Lee loved him and how excited she always is around him.

Dear diary,

all I want in my life is stability and normalcy. That is all I'm asking for. I wish to have a small home to live in. I wish to not have to worry about money. I wish to have someone who will take care of me and love me.

Early 20s in the 21st century is the worst for this stuff.

Tiel sat down and cried. She cried and cried and cried. Suddenly everything overwhelmed her and she thought about how much of her life is a lie. How many facts she hid and ignored to feel good. So much work had to be done to have the order she wanted in life. Maybe one day everything will go away. Maybe one day she won't actually have to deal with any of this shit.

One ended things through flowers and sweets,

the other would leave and hit the streets.

This one however just keeps fucking talking and makes me even madder. -_-;;

It's funny how one ex makes me sad because I think of things that could have been

and how one makes me happy because I think of things that have happened.

Today I heard you name and went insane

I remember the good ole days where I'd walk in quietly

while you were sleeping.

I'd lie down next to you

and slowly inch over

praying, hoping

just for you to touch me.

I turned away on my side

and moved millimeters at a time towards you.

I remember the good ole days

where all it took

was a lift of my shirt

and your hand on my skin.

I was all yours.

Why did my first boyfriend have to be so good

why couldn't I date a bad guy first

Honestly I use my Facebook like I do my Twitter now. I only want to share my thoughts and opinions while not caring about others.

*sigh*

This is why I'm getting lonely.

Dear diary,
I have a boyfriend and I love him very much but I am starting to get too clingy. What do I do?

Sleeping on time is very difficult for me, especially since I feel so alive at night.

I wish I could just sleep with him.

One day we'll live together and my clinginess won't seem as weird.

Mostly because he'd be right there and I can quickly share the Reddit posts I find interesting by bringing over my laptop.

My dreams for when I move out include a beautiful gaming area, my own bedroom,  and a place to cook :)

I'm sorry. Can I wake up now? Am I still young? I'm so sad.

Nhi, you're so silly! You're only 20. :)

... Okay.

Sometimes it is just so hard to move on and one regret turns into three years of bad decisions.